We’ve recently implemented Yammer, and I’ve noticed some patterns when people start having online conversations.
Initially they lurk. Scoff at the chatter. Then something
touches a nerve – something of deeper importance to them. Something that is not
to be taken lightly.
And they feel compelled to participate. AND THEY CRASH THE
CONVERSATION, YELLING ‘THIS IS THE TRUTH. I HAVE SPOKEN. NOW YOU MUST STOP’
But they discover that online you cannot draw a line under a
conversation. It is not under your control. You are not the parent. Whatever authority they have
outside of that context is suddenly, bewilderingly, negated. They have only the
delicate, fragile opinion that they sheltered close to their heart and now
expose to the light – only to see it battered and bruised in the encounter.
Someone says ‘I disagree’. They take this personally. Unable to let go of the thread they rage back and forth as if their very existence were at stake saying ‘YOU ARE WRONG, WRONG, WRONG’
Eventually – if they stick with it – they learn something. They learn to take perspective. They learn not to become too attached to their beliefs. They learn that the conversation strengthens, not weakens, a point of view. They learn that there will always be someone who disagrees. And that this is OK. Because the conversation begins when someone says ‘I disagree’.
Someone says ‘I disagree’. They take this personally. Unable to let go of the thread they rage back and forth as if their very existence were at stake saying ‘YOU ARE WRONG, WRONG, WRONG’
Eventually – if they stick with it – they learn something. They learn to take perspective. They learn not to become too attached to their beliefs. They learn that the conversation strengthens, not weakens, a point of view. They learn that there will always be someone who disagrees. And that this is OK. Because the conversation begins when someone says ‘I disagree’.
Bravo! Love this blog, Nick!
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